You know how the saying goes – men are from Mars, women are from Venus and they both speak totally, fucking different languages. Well, at least that’s what a lot of men will tell you. In fact, I’m pretty sure that every single guy on this planet has had at least a handful of “what the hell do I say now?” moments while talking to a woman that they’re interested in. I’m sure you have and I know I have. So it’s a good thing you’re here reading.
Man
men feel anxious
before approaching a woman, because they are afraid of an awkward silence,
even more than of a potential rejection. When you’re trying to attract a
woman you are interested in, any conversations that you have with her are
like little games of poker. Your goal is to get her to invest an equal or
greater amount of effort into the conversation, because the more invested she
is in your conversation the more invested she is going to be in your
interaction.
All great seducers understand this. They know that sharing a great
conversation with a woman isn’t just about what they say to her. They
understand that it’s as much about what they can get a woman saying back to
them.
It’s
this conversational effort that a woman commits that will help you find
commonalities between the two of you to create rapport, and help you discover
unique things about her that you can show genuine attraction towards; both
crucial ingredients if you are to escalate the interaction towards a romantic
or sexual outcome.
So
in today’s article I want to share six conversational topics that I think are
more effective than others when it comes to interacting with and attracting
women.
2. Relationships:
3. The People Around You:
4.
Travel:
5.
Observations About Her:
6.
Her Passions, Her Dreams and Her Goals:
1. Books, Movies, Music
and Art:
Let’s face it. You’re not going to have a woman bearing her soul to you and sharing her hopes, dreams and deepest fears with you from the get go. You’ll need to build a whole lot of comfort and rapport before you get there. This is why you need a few conversational topics that are low effort and still engaging to get things started. Getting a woman talking about her favorite books, movies, music or art is a great way to do so.
The trick here, however, is to not ask for too little. For example, if a woman tells you that she loves music, don’t just ask her what her favorite band is. Ask her for two songs from her favorite band that she thinks you should listen to and ask her what those two songs mean to her. Or if a woman tells you that she loves to read, instead of just asking her who her favorite author is ask her to recommend a book to you and get her to tell you what it’s about.
Not only will this allow you to coax her into putting more conversational effort into your interaction, but it’ll also help you find out things that you both are into.
2. Relationships:
I swear to God, relationship related topics are like
conversational crack for most women. And if there’s one thing that women love
more than hearing relationship stories, it’s coming up with solutions to
relationship problems.
So
the next time you hear about your little cousin’s problems with her boyfriend,
or hear about your roommate complain about his overly possessive girlfriend,
make a mental note of the story and use it in conversation. You’ll be surprised
with just how into these topics women can get.
3. The People Around You:
Sometimes I hear a lot of guys complain saying that they run out
of topics to talk about when they’re with a girl that they’re interested in.
But here’s the thing. If you pay close attention to your surroundings the
chances are that you’ll find more than enough conversational ammunition to last
a whole day.
For
example, there’s a fun little game that I love playing with girls that I’m out
on dates on. I call it the “what’s their story” game. When you’re out on a date
with a girl, pick a stranger at random and talk about what you imagine what
their story must be like. And then ask your date to tell you her version. Once
she gets the hang of it start getting more and more imaginative and ridiculous
with your stories. I guarantee that you’ll both have a blast.
4.
Travel:
Whenever
I’m interacting with a woman I always try to direct the conversation in a
direction that’s fun and imaginative. I hate conversations that drab and
uninteresting. And if there’s one thing I’ve learned through my experiences
with women is that talking about travel always gets them feeling happy and
excited.
You
see, people love to travel, and those who aren’t able to travel daydream about
having either the time or the money to do it. The key here, again, is to ask
for more than just an impersonal list of travel destinations.
Ask
her where the most exciting place she’s travelled to was and what she loved
about it. Or ask her where she would go if she could disappear for an entire
month without having to worry about her work or any other responsibilities. These
types of conversations will get her imagination firing on overdrive and put her
in an uplifted emotional state; both feelings which she will start associating
with you.
5.
Observations About Her:
There’s
a school of thought among some men who teach attraction skills that a guy
should never compliment or show interest in a woman. I disagree. I believe that
to truly attract and seduce a woman you need to make her feel as if she’s won you over. To do this you need to find out
things about her that are unique and appreciate them. Being curious about women
can significantly Improve your dating life!
You
see, a woman’s observational skills are often much more keenly tuned than a
man, and being with a man who notices things that other men usually don’t will
have a powerful effect on her.
Does
she have a fashion sense that you hardly ever get to see on other women? Does
she circle words that she thinks sound cute when she’s reading? Let her know
that you notice these things and ask her about them. And when she tells you
these stories let her know that you find these things attractive about her.
6.
Her Passions, Her Dreams and Her Goals:
Do
you remember the last time someone showed genuine interest in your dreams and
goals? It’s always such a nice feeling to talk about things that you are
passionate about with a person who’s genuinely interested in these things. And
here’s the cool thing. Once you’ve built up a certain level of trust and
rapport with a woman, all you need to do to find out these things about her is
to ask.
You
see, sometimes being a great conversationalist is like learning to become a
mirror. The point isn’t to grope about blindly in search of things that your conversational partner to talk about.
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